The Struggle


Since this is my first entry I wanted to explain my passion and reasoning behind this blog. 

I'm 25 years old, I weigh anywhere from 160 to 165 pounds, (it fluctuates too much for me to write one number) and I truly enjoy working out and eating right. Don't get me wrong, I have my days where I simply don't want to workout or feel like stuffing my face with an entire pizza. (just kidding I WISH I had that kind of talent, I can maybe push it to four slices) But for the most part I live a pretty healthy lifestyle and am content with my weight. 

I did struggle with my weight for a long time and at one point, probably for about three years in college, I became obsessed with dieting. I was constantly thinking about when and what I was going to eat, narrowing it down to the hour and portion. I was making it hard to focus on anything else, my school work and social life was becoming affected by it. I didn't go to an event because I had to workout or didn't want to be tempted to eat something that wasn't in my diet. I didn't allow myself to think about anything else other then my diet and exercise plan. For the most part I could not get any lower then 150 pounds, I was in the 150 pound area all through high school. At one point I weighed about 143 pounds and was pleased with how I looked, that weight lasted about two weeks. However, I was not happy with my lifestyle. I was not enjoying my life, I was constantly trying to fix my body to look the way so many other girls on campus looked. Well, it took an amazing nutritionist to point out to me that I was trying to meet an unreachable goal weight, my body was fighting against all my dieting to be at my Natural Body Weight. The weight that my body is meant to be, when it's the most comfortable and feeling the best. She pointed out to me that a size three life is not possible for everyone. That's when I realized I should have known this because my entire life I had been "chubbier" or "big boned," my body was never twig-size OR fit into size three jeans. She pointed out that from what I had told her over our sessions, I actually enjoy working out and am aware of what food my body needs to be healthy. I just needed to fill my life with the activities and foods I truly enjoy, not the ones I have to. This changed my entire outlook...

Which brings me to the past couple of years. I really do enjoy working out or what I like to call it, "being active." I try and fill everyday with some sort of activity. Whether it be running, walking, spinning, swimming, surfing, snowboarding, hiking, chasing my niece and nephew around, cliff jumping, pole dancing, yoga, the list goes on and on. I enjoy it all. I love the feeling afterwards, reflecting on what I accomplished, being able to take a big breath of air and know what I just achieved. I don't look at being active as a chore or a requirement, I look at it as a hobby, something I want to fill my life with. A huge part of my love for fitness is from Hit The Mark Fitness. Mark and the trainers taught me to enjoy the workout I'm doing and to look forward to the change that is coming. I learned so much from HTM and owe a lot of my workout ideas to them. (Thanks HTM team!)

I also LOVE LOVE LOVE food. I love cooking, for myself and guests, exploring new recipes and enjoying others creations. I know what will give me the energy to make it through my long days and will satisfy me till my next meal. I do admit, I still think about food A LOT. But it's not in an obsessive way, it's more of an excited way. I hate the thought of dieting or other people dieting. I do however understand challenges. For example, I love to challenge myself to go an entire month without any added sugars, because sugar is my freakin' weakness, I love it, I can't get enough of it and I need to get it under control. So when I go a month without sugar it tests my self-control and it reminds me that I can satisfy a sweet craving with so many other things other then chocolate, ice cream, cookies, candy, etc. -__- When others challenge themselves to go without a certain thing for personal reasons, not dietary reasons I love it. Ninety percent of the time a challenge will improve your health in someways so I can fully support that. More on challenges later. 

Anyways, my healthy lifestyle is sometimes very hard to live due to the fact that I usually have at least two jobs at a time. I have learned that working 60 hour weeks makes it difficult for me to find the energy to workout or eat right. But when a week goes by and I don't get outside and be active or I eat crap the entire time I feel like complete crap. Over the years of working these multiple jobs I have come to learn ways of beating this crap of a feeling and I am more then stoked to share all of them with you because I want you to know that it's not impossible and anyone can achieve this healthy lifestyle with the right tools.